This is my first time writing in 2014. I took a little bit of a break simply because I wanted to- and isn’t that exactly what blogging is supposed to be? Anyways, back to the point. At the end of 2013, I was feeling a little lost. I’d been blogging a lot about how terrible I was feeling since graduating University and about how I was stuck in a slump. I was trying to make a huge decision about going back and doing some post-grad schooling, was having mini-meltdowns before and after work at least once a week, and I wasn’t doing anything except watching Netflix on my days off.
Years ago, I was diagnosed with depression and after I had Holly I also struggled with postpartum depression. After so many years of dealing with my own ups and downs, I’ve become extremely self aware and realized that I was starting to become depressed. I knew something had to change.
This year has started out better than I could have ever imagined. I’m honestly on cloud nine about how much I’ve already accomplished this year, and even more so about how optimistic I feel about the rest of it.
2014 began with me realizing what I had to do- figure it out. I started doing what I know best- journaling, spending time with Chris and my girls, and really taking the time to think about what I needed. I ended up making a decision and within a weeks time, starting school again. As of right now, I’m taking part-time graduate studies in human resources management to add to my degrees. I’m really happy about that. I’ve also made some intense decisions regarding my health and decided to stop taking medications I’ve been on since I was 18. That’s been a struggle, but I’m working through it. Finally, I’ve changed my state of mind. Creativity has always been my outlet, but sometimes I forget that it’s something I need to do to avoid getting all up inside my own head, so with 2014 came a whole bunch of writing and a whole bunch of drawing and painting.
I feel significantly better. I feel on track. I feel like I’m not struggling anymore.
I’ve always had an issue with getting restless when my life doesn’t feel like it’s progressing, and I no longer feel restless.
2014 feels like an amazing year so far, and I can’t wait to see what happens during the rest of it.